12/7 - Epi 295 ... RTR - Back to Starting Point, Bitwa

Thursday 12th July

One long drawn out scene with completely hysterical Anjali and very dirty pair of forceps ... Arnav is completely useless in emotional situations ... first he tells the doctor to get out, he'll handle Anjali, then he panics and yells for doctor to come back ... Bitwa, you should have let the doctor sedate her and get her into that strait jacket I spoke about yesterday.

DB's acting was much better today ... in the scene with the forceps I was reminded of The Other Side of Midnight, (Sidney Sheldon) where a woman kills her unborn baby at the last possible moment in the most painful way possible, because she wants the baby to suffer all the pain its father gave her.
But of course, Anjali has deeper issues ... she will be left alone again, like she was on her wedding day when her parents died and her marriage broke ... completely helpless, with a younger brother to look after ... in place of a brother, now a child to look after ...

In the scene with Arnav. don't know it was genuinely hysterical, back to child Anjali pleading with her brother to make everything all right again ... a younger brother who had to take over the role of an elder far too soon ... or it was a manipulative woman, seeking to bring back her brother into her fold, and remove the woman whom she believed was the cause of all their troubles ... to the point where she actually convinced Arnav too ... if Khushi hadn't come into their lives, they would have all remained in their happy little world ... again, DB was very good here ...
Mami added the final spark ... and Arnav's temper makes a comeback ... and how ...!!!

Poor Khushi ... I felt like crying for her ... :(
Does no one stop to think what she has gone through at the hands of that man?
Does Arnav not stop to think how much happier and more peaceful Khushi's life would have been if he hadn't entered it?!

I am glad Khushi will walk out now ... Arnav is back to starting point on that RTR of his ... all the miles he redeemed just got cancelled out. And it looks like they will have a full fledged RTR after all ... after that outburst of Arnav's, it's definitely needed.

*edited*

Another very good episode today, high on drama, and very good acting ... today Daljeet stepped up to the plate .. and each of of the main three was right and wrong in their own way, but the person I felt the least sorry for was Arnav, actually ... comparatively speaking ... have explained why later.
Lots of Anjali character analysis today - not much to her credit :)

So Anjali enters a room with surgical instruments ... ready to take an ultimate step ...
When people are genuinely depressed to the point of being suicidal, they choose methods which have a greater chance of success ... but often, suicide attempts are more like calls for help ... and such people choose attempts that are likely to fail but will draw attention to themselves ...
And Anjali is doing exactly that ... calling for help ... she is overwhelmed by everything that has happened, her world has spiralled completely out of her control ... Earlier she was completely in control of it, as well as of everyone within it ... her husband, her brother both danced to her tunes, but now one has been thrown out by the other ... and she is left helpless to do anything about it ... she doesn't like it ... she doesn't understand it ...
And she's not suicidal, she wants to kill her baby ... because her brother said he did all this for the baby's sake ... but the baby will have the same life that she had in her past ... helpless and alone, because everyone hates the father. She will be alone, left to take care of her baby, because her family hates its father ... as helpless as she was when she was alone with a younger brother to take of when she lost her parents, and was thrown out on the road, abandoned by the man who promised to marry her and left her on her wedding day ... now abandoned by her baby's father ... alone again ... with another child to look after ...

That day the child stepped up and took over the role of caretaker and parent, and she survived ... but now ... who will take care of her? Not her child surely ... she needs to be looked after ... she is not strong enough to do the looking after ... so the baby has to go ...

And Mami continues to blame Khushi for everything ... unfairly as usual ... but then Arnav has not yet told the entire house the entire truth ...

And the instrument Anjali chooses .... was it deliberate? Scissors, scalpels all lying on the tray, yet she picks up a blunt forceps ... another sign that this is a call for help, not a deliberate attempt to harm herself ... because people like Anjali are careful not to harm themselves ... their motive is to draw attention, not to actually hurt themselves. Anjali seeking out a doctor who knows her and her family, her desire to hurt the baby but not herself, in the middle of a crowded nursing home, where she can be sure to be found just in time ... all her actions show that she is crying out for help ... her world is crumbling and she can't deal with it ...

Where Nani and Mami erred was in assuming Anjali should be left alone to deal with the trauma, to come to terms with it ...
What Anjali wants, in her delusional, half-crazed state, is her perfect little world to be restored, with herself at the center of it ...
What she needs is actually exactly what Khushi tried to give her ... come to terms with the facts, that Shyam was evil, and she is best rid of him ... she has a home, a loving family, a baby coming ... she has to count her blessings and move on.

When I remembered the scene from The Other Side of Midnight, I also remember that the girl was very clear on what she wanted to do ... she went to the doctor regularly, and kept asking one question - can the baby feel anything yet? Only when the doctor said yes, the baby can feel pain now, did the girl go ahead to abort ... and she did the deed in complete private ... because she wanted to succeed.

That's why I feel that this was a cry for help ... Anjali did not want to abort the baby ... all she wanted was her perfect world back ... the collapse of her world was what scared her ... not the infidelity of her husband. 
And in reality ... don't many women make that compromise in real life? Put up with abuse, put up with husband's infidelity, his less than perfect behaviour ... because they are scared of the alternative?
True, Anjali has less reason to be scared than most ... because she has a support system to return to, unlike many of those women ... but to admit her husband was unfaithful and did not love her is a repeat heartbreak - her first husband-to-be did not love her enough either, to stand by her when her world broke up the first time ...

Anjali needs help ... I can understand her ... I sympathise with her, I feel sorry for her ... I still don't like what she's doing, and despise and detest her for not being strong even for her child. She failed her younger brother once upon a time, and he had to grow up overnight and lose his childhood to take care of her ... now she is failing him again, he has found happiness in his life, but she will force him to lose it to take care of her ... and she is failing the child she carries.

So Arnav discovers her just in time ... or so he thinks (methinks Anjali would have waited for someone to find her anyway) ... and Anjali cracks up completely into hysterics ... either that or it is the performance of her life ... yeah, yeah, I'm cynical ... ;)
And she tells Arnav she doesn't want her baby ... and also tells him in her hysterical speech, exactly why ... because everyone hates its father, and she will have to bear the burden all alone ... because everyone in her family hates its father ... note, she doesn't hate the father, but her family does, and her family is the one who has to look after the baby ... her baby will be left all alone ...
Errmmm ... why alone? She, the mother, will be with her child, won't she? But Anjali is always the one who needs to be looked after ... she can never really do the looking after ... Anjali has never grown up ... the pampered princess, the eternal child, stuck in a time warp.

Arnav, you really should have listened to the doctor when she said Anjali is not in her senses. I really don't know why the doctor allowed her to go back home, she should have been hospitalised under observation.

And Anjali reiterates that roleplay when she begs Arnav, like a child begging her parent ... please restore my world, bring back my husband, we were so happy earlier, why did all this have to happen?

Arnav picking up Anjali, putting her in her bed, and the way she held him back by holding his hand left a bad taste in my mouth ... almost incestuous, seeing that those actions had occurred just a short while ago with Khushi. As did the superimposition of Anjali in Arnav's arms, over the picture of Anjali and Shyam ... does it imply that now that Shyam is no longer in Anjali's life, she will make sure that Arnav is very much in it? And that she takes top spot in his life, over even his wife?

Arnav is in a bad place, stuck between a rock and a hard place ... but a lot of it is his doing ... the rest of it, is of course Shyam's. And Arnav has to prioritise his life quickly ... if Khushi is to be a part of it, and he really loves her as much as he claims, then respecting his wife and getting his priorities straight, is on top of the reform agenda for Arnav.

And Anjali is suddenly back to normal, and to Chotey ... since breaking off with Arnav didn't make him run to do her bidding and get Shyam back, she switches tactics ... after those hysterics about being alone, and no one to look after her, she now is all clinging child ... she wants her perfect world back, and her brother has to wave his magic wand and do it for her ... They were so happy till a little while ago ... kiski buri nazar lag gayi?
Humein kya ho gaya hai? Hum dono ko kya ho gaya hai?

Umm, you got rid of a scumbag scoundrel of a husband, and your brother found the love of his life ... all good, right?
Nope, not for Anjali ... she wants her fantasy land back, where her husband made love to her with his false honeyed words all the time ... so what if they were false? At least they made her happy! :-o

And unfortunately Arnav is kaan ka kachha and all kinds of an emotional fool when it comes to his sister ... and her words start stirring the poison ... I really don't know whether this was intentional or not, but like I said, Anjali is manipulative and she knows exactly how to pull her brother's strings. And Arnav is very vulnerable ...

This would have been the right time, the right place and the right person to say Khushi's words back to Anjali ... Shyam was a bad dream, forget him and move on, time always goes forward, never backwards ... you have a new life to look forward to and we're all with you ...
But unfortunately Arnav loses the opportunity ... his helplessness when Anjali begs him to restore her world robs him of all common sense ...he is as damged as Anjali is, because his fear of losing her makes him lose his thinking power. Of the three, Khushi is the most practical and sensible, unfortunately, she's the one who is always accused of being wrong, because mostly people don't like to hear good advice, especially when it's tough.

And Anjali fills his ears some more ... we were all so happy earlier ... don't know because of whom this happened ... but Shyam is her happiness, and she wants him back ...
Is Anjali delusional or manipulative? This is where my doubts started, big time ... after the first blunt forceps scene.

Could Arnav not have told her, that the happiness she spoke about was false, a mirage ... and she has to start accepting the truth?
No, Arnav failed big time ... here as a brother ... which is why, of the three, I feel the least sorry for him today. He knows, as well as Khushi does, even better because he knows it firsthand, what a kameena Shyam was ... and he failed to even make a small dent in Anjali's bubble ... or even try. Feeling sorry for Anjali is simply not good enough ... he heard the doctor say it, and he saw for himself, how shaken and delusional she is ... and now he sees again, her refusal to see the truth ... and he does nothing about it.

Mami comes and stirs the cauldron of poison more ... Khushi went to Anjali's room, and after that Anjali left for the nursing home ... what did Khushi say that pushed Anjali into taking this step?
Nani went to the temple, and Mami was looking for Lakshmi??? Really? You have a depressed, almost suicidal daughter/granddaughter at home, and one lady goes to the temple, the other on a goat hunt? And then you blame Khushi for trying to make a pregnant woman eat?

Interestingly, most of Anjali's fb's at the doctor's were Shyam and Arnav - Arnav slapping Shyam and throwing him out ... only the last one was Khushi telling her to look after her baby ... so was Khushi the straw that broke the camel's back? 

And Arnav loses it big time ... he starts off well enough, and understandably angry ... why did Khushi go to Anjali's room when she was told expressly not to? And old habits die hard ... as usual he doesn't listen when Khushi tries to answer ... when Khushi is facing the firing from his family, he keeps quiet, and when he fires at her, he doesn't give her a chance to talk?! He can't fire his Di, because she's too weak, so as usual, Khushi is his emotional punching bag to release all his frustrations and helplessness.
Back to starting point of RTR for you, my boy!!! X(

And when Khushi fires back that she went because she cares for Anjali as much as he does, then he loses it completely and says the most unforgiveable words ... all this happened because of you!

Wonder what will happen when Arnav realises it all actually happened because of him? X( And Shyam of course ...

And Arnav unknowingly spills out the poison that Anjali has filled in his mind ... everything was perfectly all right till Khushi came into their lives ... Di was happy ... happy in her delusional world, is that really what you want for your sister, Arnav?

And the most unforgiveable of all ... If you hadn't come into our lives, Shyam would not have done all this ... we would have gone on happily ... and Di would have been happy today ...

RTR mileage doubled ... no, make that tripled. Yeah right, Bitwa, blame the woman, the femme fatale ... your KJ was one sweet innocent masoom bachha who got seduced by the wicked siren ...
How can Arnav even think this, let alone say it ... when he heard Shyam's words himself, that Shyam had never loved Anjali ever??!!! That their entire marriage was a farce? Not only the last six months, mind! X( X(

And that's why Arnav goes to the bottom of the 'feel sorry for' pool today ... 

And the final words which break Khushi's heart all over again ... have forgotten how many times Arnav has done this, starting with Diwali ... You're the biggest mistake of my life, Khushi Kumari Gupta. I wish you had never entered my life!
And he leaves ... leaving Khushi completely broken, worse than ever before ... a glimpse of heaven, and then back to hell ...

Does Arnav even deserve Khushi at all?! Will he never learn from his mistakes?!
If he hadn't had those fb's and remembered belatedly what Khushi had actually done for him, Arnav would have been dead meat for me today ... but again, too little, too late ... a simple sorry, I was angry and didn't think what I was saying is not enough to cut it this time.

Khushi HAS TO break this chain of emotional abuse, repentance and make up ... the classic cycle of domestic abuse. Domestic abuse needn't always be physical - emotional abuse is even worse.
So Khushi has to walk out at least once ... to give Arnav the fear of really losing her. Apparently that cliffside incident and her near-death wasn't enough.

And I'm glad the cv's have decided to have a redemption track ... after tonight, Arnav really needs to walk that path. And the end goal will be reached only when Khushi is placed firmly above Di on his priority list, given the respect and regard she deserves from each and every member of the family, he discloses the entire truth to everyone, including his blind delusional sister ... oh, and Mami is expressly forbidden to use the words Phati saree ever again in her life!