24th June Monday
Munh dikhayi ... fortunately they didn't linger much over Chhanchhan's embarrassment, and Chhanchhan apologised to Umaben for her embarrassment ... that bothered her more. Umaben doesn't mind getting embarrassed by temporary bahu ... all the more ammunition in her arsenal for getting rid of her eventually ...
Umaben tries to instigate her dear hubby and sons against rotimaker rotis ... only to be stymied ... the rotis made for the family are the normal handmade ones. Oops, that didn't go well
Manek worriedly suggests Umaben needs a visit to the dentist. Umaben has to eat her words ... along with the rotis.
Tradition in the BS house is that the bahus eat after everyone else has eaten ... Chhanchhan doesn't like this tradition at all. Good, good, I was wondering when she would start getting restless with the crazy rules ...
Manav steals back at night to surprise his loving wife ... and gets beaten up for his pains!
Some really cute ChhanMan scenes ... at night and in the morning
Night again a mirror image ... this time Manav goes off to sleep waiting for his wife ... after some sweet nothings and cuddles ... And it's her turn to tuck him up ...
In the morning, some more sweet nothings and still more cuddles ... ChhanMan are settling into this blissfully happily married bit very easily ... till Ranjana bhabhi interrupts with "bad tea" ... Ranjana bhabhi is officially KMH in chief!
Ranjana uses her moment to chugli karo to Manav about how she and Sanjana got into trouble, and not only them, Baa got embarrassed ... all because Chhanchhan doesn't know how to wear a saree properly. Chhanchhan is very embarrassed and nervous ... Manav is surprised ... why can't you walk in a saree, when the bhabhis do all the work in them?
But after Ranjana leaves, he's more understanding ... yet not very helpful ... you'll learn.
I thought he would say, you don't need to wear sarees.That's one tradition which is going to be more difficult to change ...
Not if Umaben has anything to do with it. Ranjana is gleeful ... she's created some trouble for Chhanchhan ... Manav wasn't happy she couldn't manage a saree. Umaben overhears ... another chance for Divide and Rule ... this time she will win ...
So precap - Umaben tells Chhanchhan she can wear suits. And thereby lets loose World War 3 in the BS home ...
Munh dikhayi ... fortunately they didn't linger much over Chhanchhan's embarrassment, and Chhanchhan apologised to Umaben for her embarrassment ... that bothered her more. Umaben doesn't mind getting embarrassed by temporary bahu ... all the more ammunition in her arsenal for getting rid of her eventually ...
Umaben tries to instigate her dear hubby and sons against rotimaker rotis ... only to be stymied ... the rotis made for the family are the normal handmade ones. Oops, that didn't go well
Manek worriedly suggests Umaben needs a visit to the dentist. Umaben has to eat her words ... along with the rotis. Tradition in the BS house is that the bahus eat after everyone else has eaten ... Chhanchhan doesn't like this tradition at all. Good, good, I was wondering when she would start getting restless with the crazy rules ...
Manav steals back at night to surprise his loving wife ... and gets beaten up for his pains!
Some really cute ChhanMan scenes ... at night and in the morning
Night again a mirror image ... this time Manav goes off to sleep waiting for his wife ... after some sweet nothings and cuddles ... And it's her turn to tuck him up ... In the morning, some more sweet nothings and still more cuddles ... ChhanMan are settling into this blissfully happily married bit very easily
... till Ranjana bhabhi interrupts with "bad tea" ... Ranjana bhabhi is officially KMH in chief! Ranjana uses her moment to chugli karo to Manav about how she and Sanjana got into trouble, and not only them, Baa got embarrassed ... all because Chhanchhan doesn't know how to wear a saree properly. Chhanchhan is very embarrassed and nervous ... Manav is surprised ... why can't you walk in a saree, when the bhabhis do all the work in them?
But after Ranjana leaves, he's more understanding ... yet not very helpful ... you'll learn.
I thought he would say, you don't need to wear sarees.That's one tradition which is going to be more difficult to change ...
Not if Umaben has anything to do with it. Ranjana is gleeful ... she's created some trouble for Chhanchhan ... Manav wasn't happy she couldn't manage a saree. Umaben overhears ... another chance for Divide and Rule ... this time she will win ...
So precap - Umaben tells Chhanchhan she can wear suits. And thereby lets loose World War 3 in the BS home ...
I want to like this show. I keep watching each episode in the hope that it will grow on me but apart from snatches of brilliance from individual actors/actresses, it is not coming together as a whole for me. The plot line though cliched could be compulsive if the characters were fleshed out well. :(
ReplyDeleteThat said Ranjana stole the show for me today.
copy pasting my reply from IF to your post dia..
ReplyDeleteIf you ask me, then I believe wearing a saree is not exactly a tradition, yes it looks like that in the way that is is made obligatory, but after all it it just another clothing style .. and nothing is more Indian than a saree, I think every Indian girl looks her most beautiful in a saree (and we have the perfect example of Sanaya ) ..and Manav right now has no clue about how comfortable or uncomfortable Chanchan is in a saree, because honestly he doesnt really know her that much..they got married pretty fast .. and ofcourse he wouldnt expect her to wear sarees when they went out on the couple of dates that they did .. he thinks its completely normal for a girl to wear a saree and has grown up in a house where he saw all the married ladies wearing a saree, plus, he has seen Chanchan's mom and her dadi wearing sarees...so he thinks it is pretty normal for a girl to switch to sarees once she gets married and believes that Chanchan already knows this .. so I dont think he is wrong in expecting Chanchan to be able to carry off a saree... and even Chanchan is fine with wearing sarees.. maybe what should change is the frequency of wearing a saree, that a saree should be worn only during pujas and ther such big occasions and otherwise it is okay to wear salwar suits..which is pretty much how normal families function..
but as far as the pallu bit is concerned, yes I think that is one tradition that you should get rid off asap.. and it would be great if they show Manav realising it ..although how, I have no clue..so for me, it would be good if either of Ranjana or Sanjana realise about the unfairness of the pallu bit .. Kaumudi wouldn't, since she is the quiet mellow type of a bahu accepting whatever comes her way..
Also another tradition that needs to be changed is that DILs sit together on a dining table with everybody .. the entire family..cannot blame Chanchan for wanting her life pre marriage translate into her post marriage, but also agree with Ranjana when she says that things are bound to change after marriage..I liked the fact that Ranjana-Sanjana started thinking there was something amiss about all the factors that they percieved to be a "norm" in this house...
Ranjana is super jealous of Chanchan right now because acc to her Chanchan has everything that she had dreamt of but couldnt have .. but I believe she would be the first one to agree with Chanchan's values and beliefs too, because in a way, she too wants to be a free bird, unlike Kaumudi and Sanjana..
ChanMan scenes were a dream.. :))) they do look GOOOD together.. Anuj was right.. :))
DeleteWearing sarees is not a tradition ... saree is the traditional Indian dress, as is salwar kameez/churidar kurta, lehnga choli, the sarongs of NE India ... even the different styles of saree tying are traditions of the individual states and cultures. Different styles of dressing actually evolved because they were suited for that time and climate ... saree of course is the oldest known traditional dress, because it involved no stitching at all, so it actually pre-dates tailoring! It's a wonder such an ancient dress has survived so many thousands of years and it has to be because it is not only part of tradition, but because it is also comfortable and convenient clothing in the country it evolved in.
DeleteSo are salwar suits - I find myself far more comfortable in suits than in jeans or skirts when I go to India, because they are far more suited for the climate. I like jeans only in winter - in summer, I prefer wearing churidars and salwars - they cover you completely from the sun and are loose enough to be comfortable.
And that's exactly the point. Clothes should be comfortable, convenient and appropriate to the time and place. If you work in a Western style organisation, wear western clothes by all means. But currently, two days into married life in her new home, with in-laws all over the place, it is perfectly appropriate for CC to wear sarees ... or any Indian dress, actually .. On the contrary, it would be inappropriate for her to slip into jeans so soon. A few weeks or months after marriage, fine ... if she decides to start working again, also fine ...
It's funny ... we were in the interiors of China two weeks ago for a holiday, in a really remote village, and one of the things I noticed was that very few Chinese wear traditional clothes any more. All of them, young and old, were in Western wear ... jeans, shorts, T-shirts ... Traditional Chinese dress in the interiors, from what I gathered, is long loose peasant style skirts with long sleeved loose tops ... very convenient and pretty outfits, but with the advent of Western dress, the traditional outfits seem to be lost. And that is actually a pity. Same thing in Japan - most office going girls wear Western clothes - you hardly see any Japanese girls wearing traditional everyday Japanese dresses - I don't even know what everyday Japanese wear is.
While in countries like India, Indonesia, Malaysia, Vietnam, you do see people still wearing the traditional dress, because it is comfortable, convenient and acceptable. And I like it that way ... a country should retain its traditional dresses ... why ape the West in this? What are only Western clothes acceptable?
I live abroad - I wear Western dress all the time because I would stick out like a sore thumb if I didn't. But I love wearing Indian ... I wear Western because it's more appropriate and acceptable where I live ... not necessarily because I want to all the time. Am I being forced - no? I'm merely dressing appropriate to the circumstances ... BY CHOICE.
And THAT is the point - one should wear what one wishes to wear - BUT one has to see the circumstances and decide. It should not be forced on a person.
DeleteCurrently CC is not averse to wearing Sarees ... it's appropriate for a newly married girl. She's not used to the pallu, and since that is not comfortable for her, she should be allowed to drop it - IF she wants to. If she wants to go out with Manav and wear something different, more appropriate to where they are going, again it should be her choice. If elders or more traditional visitors are present, she should dress in Indian clothes ... there is no harm. As long as clothes are comfortable and appropriate, she can wear what she wants. She can drop the pallu in the kitchen ... the men don't come in there, and if she can't handle it, it's a fire hazard, then it's stupid to insist on it there. Ideally she should dress in suits while in the kitchen, she can change into a saree when the men come home, if sarees are mandatory in front of the FIL and elder BILs. Even more ideally, there should be no dress code - as long as her clothes are decent and appropriate, she can wear what she likes. But that point in the journey is a long way away ... many stops before that happens!
Heck even the burqa ... if it worn out of choice, it's fine ... if it is worn under gunpoint, it's not right. The point is freedom of choice, and making the judgement as to what is appropriate at what time.
cant resist such an inflammatory topic.
ReplyDelete"purdah" is a north indian system where ladies cover themselves from the men, generally that covering of the face and hair, especially from men other than their own husband. (as respect or anything else, the matter remains that the women cover their head. )
from time immemorial in gujarati society, it is the married women who wear the pallo over their head.. so is this not a rite of passage for any new bride?
yes, cc finds it difficult because she does not routinely wear a sari, even her mom wears a sari without the palla.. so marrying into the borisagar house and following their customs, she should learn to wear a pallu.. that is one stream of thought, i think manav would agree.
conversely, i remember a character in a chetan bhagat novel (where the DIL is a call center worker who love-married.. and had to wear sarees and do all the chores of the sasuraal before going to work..and the guy turned out to be line maaroing another girl)
so obviously, there has to be a line somewhere, a girl cannot do all the changing just because she earned a MRS degree.
gah i hate to leave things unfinished, and i am sure i am too cryptic and it looks random.. but sorry, no time to elaborate.
Traditions, customs, rituals ... all were made at some point for the good of society. The problems arise when the traditions are adhered to blindly, without questioning whether the circumstances are even relevant any more. Society is changing, it is dynamic ... one has to move with the times. One cannot say that these are our customs and we will adhere to them regardless. No customs are set in stone. Traditions and customs should be for the good of the people observing them, if they are not, they have lost their meaning.
DeleteTake Dowry. it originated as Streedhan. Girls were not entitled to the father's property in the olden days, they were not heirs when the parents died. Hence Streedhan was given to them at marriage, as their share of their parent's inheritance. Besides, girls were not educated as much as boys, they were not expected to work and be financially independent - so the streedhan was their personal wealth, their insurance in case the husband died or some other misfortune happened.
Today girls are equal heirs, they are educated, hold jobs, and are entitled by law to parents' property. So why is dowry still given? Tradition which had meaning when it started, has become completely irrelevant today.
Take Sati. In the old days, widows committed Sati. Is there anyone today who would even attempt to justify the custom? Or try to uphold it in the name of 'tradition'? Or even try to shave off women's hair and make them wear white, because it is 'tradition'? I'm not talking villages where these things still exist .. I'm talking more forward societies where people have questioned these things. And it's only when people start questioning that changes can happen.
Take pallu. In the olden days, women were confined to the homes, not well educated, not aware of the outside world. Pallu, ghunghat was a way of protection to keep them out of sight of unrelated unattached men. Is it really relevant at all today? It's taken as a mark of respect to cover one's head - in gurudwaras and temples people cover their heads, in church people remove their hats as a mark of respect ... traditions differ ... they must have started with some meaning, but now the meaning is lost and the traditions continue.
So why should a woman hide her face? Especially in this day and age? Even Umaben does not stay home ... she does social work in the Mahila Mandal, she meets outsiders. How can she justify enforcing pallu for her DILs? Just because it is tradition? That is no longer a valid answer ... not if it makes no sense.
CC's Dadi is traditional ... why her her bahu not wear the pallu? Because CC's bahu was a working woman, a professor, it was not convenient for her to keep a pallu and go to work. Does that mean she doesn't respect Dadi?
When the dress code for women has changed so much, how can one explain what significance the pallu holds - if any?
Traditions are all well and good ... but they are made to help people, not to hinder them. If they become just blind and meaningless, then they should be changed.
Having said that, Manav is also justified in his position. He hasn't seen anything else. All his bhabhis wear sarees with pallus, it has never occurred to him to question it, because it doesn't affect him at all. They eat after the family, not with them ... again, not his problem, he hasn't seen any different, he doesn't know any different. And it doesn't affect him, so he has not questioned it. Men can be pretty obtuse to all these female nuances :))) He is not an ideal husband ... he has just started his journey to become one ... or rather, become a good husband. We just discussed on the forum that there is no such thing as an ideal husband. Or an ideal wife :)))
http://www.tellychakkar.com/tv/star-gazing/heres-predicting-the-future-of-sony-tvs-upcoming-show-modern-bahu
ReplyDeleteI don't believe in predictions...came across this...true so far..
Hope I am not offending any one.