Monday 10th June 2013
Eco-friendly wedding ... hmm. Mixed feelings actually ... while it's good to stick to one's ideals, is it good to do so when it also concerns the reputation of your family and that of your in-laws? Tough call ... on the other hand, having just attended a wedding which was lavish in the extreme, to the point that even the family remonstrated with the parents of the bride for over-spending, I can see that one has to make a start somewhere. But I don't think I would have the courage to do this ... it does take a special type of courage to stick so closely to one's ideals. Most of us tend to give in and make compromises ... Chhanchhan did not make any.
Or maybe we Indians have got so used to so much pomp and ceremony and ostentatious weddings, that we have lost the beauty in simplicity. Western weddings are nowhere as grand and lavish as Indian ones ... two of my cousins got married outdoors in national parks, with minimal decorations and simple menus, and we enjoyed every minute of the celebrations. I got married in a temple, at a time when 5 star hotels were the order of the day ... my wedding was far simpler than many of my friends' weddings.
The mahila mandal ladies were happy to find fault ... the decorations were bad, the complaint about queuing up for food ... hello, ladies, everyone queues up for food at all weddings ... no one is served! But then, the mahila mandal ladies were out to criticise everything anyway. One always has people like that at every wedding.
Found the paper decorations by the orphans a bit overboard, one could avoid real flower decorations as being non-eco-friendly, and use only cloth and satin ribbons. Paper decorations are more wasteful ... they waste paper, which is also not being eco-friendly. I would think using real flowers would be more eco-friendly than using paper.
So was the insistence that the guests have to finish everything on their plates. While that can be a rule in families at home (it was in mine), hosts can't insist on it with guests.
Wonder whether Khimji bhai will stomp out in a huff, or will appreciate the thought behind the wedding. Doesn't seem so, from his expressions. The Mahila Mandal made their feelings very clear, of course ... fairly typical reactions .. in every wedding, one has a few of those type. And of course, Ranjana was very willing to add fuel to the fire ... though, to be fair, she wasn't really out to make trouble, she was only willing to add to it ... as she's already envious of Chhanchhan's beauty outstripping her own.
Liked the little interactions between CC's mom and Manav when he entered ... and then between Chhanchhan and Manav at the jaymala. They look good together ... am so glad the new Manav is here! And they managed to convey that they were totally lost in each other, even in the few scenes they had together ... though it will take a little while to get used to the new Manav.
Though I have to say, I have already forgotten FK's face, so I don't think it will take too long!
Eco-friendly wedding ... hmm. Mixed feelings actually ... while it's good to stick to one's ideals, is it good to do so when it also concerns the reputation of your family and that of your in-laws? Tough call ... on the other hand, having just attended a wedding which was lavish in the extreme, to the point that even the family remonstrated with the parents of the bride for over-spending, I can see that one has to make a start somewhere. But I don't think I would have the courage to do this ... it does take a special type of courage to stick so closely to one's ideals. Most of us tend to give in and make compromises ... Chhanchhan did not make any.
Or maybe we Indians have got so used to so much pomp and ceremony and ostentatious weddings, that we have lost the beauty in simplicity. Western weddings are nowhere as grand and lavish as Indian ones ... two of my cousins got married outdoors in national parks, with minimal decorations and simple menus, and we enjoyed every minute of the celebrations. I got married in a temple, at a time when 5 star hotels were the order of the day ... my wedding was far simpler than many of my friends' weddings.
The mahila mandal ladies were happy to find fault ... the decorations were bad, the complaint about queuing up for food ... hello, ladies, everyone queues up for food at all weddings ... no one is served! But then, the mahila mandal ladies were out to criticise everything anyway. One always has people like that at every wedding.
Found the paper decorations by the orphans a bit overboard, one could avoid real flower decorations as being non-eco-friendly, and use only cloth and satin ribbons. Paper decorations are more wasteful ... they waste paper, which is also not being eco-friendly. I would think using real flowers would be more eco-friendly than using paper.
So was the insistence that the guests have to finish everything on their plates. While that can be a rule in families at home (it was in mine), hosts can't insist on it with guests.
Wonder whether Khimji bhai will stomp out in a huff, or will appreciate the thought behind the wedding. Doesn't seem so, from his expressions. The Mahila Mandal made their feelings very clear, of course ... fairly typical reactions .. in every wedding, one has a few of those type. And of course, Ranjana was very willing to add fuel to the fire ... though, to be fair, she wasn't really out to make trouble, she was only willing to add to it ... as she's already envious of Chhanchhan's beauty outstripping her own.
Liked the little interactions between CC's mom and Manav when he entered ... and then between Chhanchhan and Manav at the jaymala. They look good together ... am so glad the new Manav is here! And they managed to convey that they were totally lost in each other, even in the few scenes they had together ... though it will take a little while to get used to the new Manav.
Though I have to say, I have already forgotten FK's face, so I don't think it will take too long!
This episode was used for dual purposes, one, to rub in the message of simple weddings and second, to deepen the battle lines between Chhanchhan and Uma Ben. Of course, the contrast between the two families was highlighted again.
ReplyDeleteThey did not show Sarabhai's going out of their way looking after Borasagar's, was that on purpose or otherwise don't know.
At the end of the day, Chhanchhan is getting married on her terms and that is using her wedding to benefit the children she cares about. So, for that I like Chhanchhan. However, the execution went overboard and showing the criticizing aunties throughout sort of made the episode a bit dull. Hope now that the the social message is out, and UB has reaffirmed her dislike, we can have more fun, cheer, emotions in the next episodes. They should also show simple does not mean boring and memories are made having loved ones around.
I think this episode was also to show how far Chhanchhan can go for her convictions and values.
Anuj and Sanaya make a good jodi, I liked their moments and hope they give us more. Chhanchhan not the demure bride, promptly calls Rugved for help ;)
I seriously hope that they show Chhanchhan also learning something from others instead of convincing others of their wrongdoing. That will add more depth and shades to Chhanchhan.
Did not mind Chhanchhan telling the elder gentleman to put the envelope in the donation box, Chhanchhan was always shown to be very forthright and frank, and that is in character.
If I have observed the credits correctly then Vipul Shah has been joined by another lady to write the story and the screenplay is being written by two new people and not Vipul Shah anymore. Changes do not seem to cease here, hope all for good.
Hope the next few episodes focus on family moments, nok jhoks and bit of romance.
-U
Just wanted to share that my brother and sister-in-law (SIL) also had somewhat similar marriage. They both decided not to burden the parents with wedding expenses and to be married according to their liking.
ReplyDeleteMy family and my SIL's family met in the morning at the venue to decorate it ourselves. Few friends brought flowers from local farmer's market and we made all the arrangements on the tables. My SIL also had a wall filled with family pictures that she framed as a place of memories, it also had photos of loved ones who had passed away and could not be there at the wedding.
The venue was a 1950's commercial building converted into a hotel and had all the old fittings still intact. Simple food, no priest, just registered wedding, reading of vows written by the couple, followed by passages and poetry written by family and friends. They exchanged garlands we made at home from flowers from our backyard. In half an hour wedding was done, the rest of the evening we spent dancing, toasting, and having fun.
So there are couples who make these choices and follow through. Some members in the family were not sure of this, but all joined in the festivities.
By coincidence my SIL's dad is a Prof and painter, he gave us his painting as a gift at the wedding :)
-U
Uma, I love this description of your brother's wedding ... what a lovely way to do things! I especially love the description of the family pictures ... something like that can't be bought with any money ... it's worth far more than that. What a lovely wedding ... truly one to remember!
DeleteMy cousin got married to an American girl, and they were married in the mountains of Montana, out in the open. They had a non-denominational wedding, the groom's side all wore Indian outfits, including the groom who was in a churidar kurta, and the bride wore a white gown. They wrote their vows themselves too, and a friend officiated and read them out. To include an Indian ritual in the ceremony, they had a jaymala. A very simple ceremony, with all close family members only, after the ceremony we all partied in a rustic mountain lodge ... I don't think it was decorated much ... maybe a few flowers.
My husband and I wanted a simple ceremony too, we had a temple wedding with only close family present, and then had a larger wedding dinner for all family and friends.
I think what is important is that the boy and girl are in agreement, and the families then come around. My husband convinced his dad for the temple wedding, and after that it was smooth sailing for us.
Dia, I lost what I had typed before, so here I go again. This episode had three purposes, one to deepen the battle lines between CC and UB,two, to show to what extent Chhanchhan can go for her convictions and three, to highlight the contrast between the families again. Sarabhai's were not shown going overboard trying to take care of Manav's family too.
ReplyDeleteThe social message was good but the execution was overdone. Hope they find a middle ground as the show tackles other issues. It would also be nice if they show Chhanchhan also learning a thing or two instead of always trying to win people over to her side.
Chhanchhan asking the elderly guest to donate his gift was in character. Chhanchhan is shown to be a woman who is very forthright and frank. She is not shy about putting her point across in front of others.
At the end of the day Chhanchhan did have a wedding of her choice and helping children ages cares about, for that I like Chhanchhan.
Now that they are done with the message and UB being upset, I want the next few episodes focusing on family moments, fun, nok jhoks and even some romance. Simple weddings need not be dull. Today the aunty criticizing bit was a little much,they should balance it out with happy, sentimental moments.
Really like Anuj with Sanaya. Their moments today were good. Chhanchhan is no shy bride, she promptly asked Rugved for help when needed ;) Curious to see how Manav's character will develop.
If I read the credits right, Vipul Shah has somebody assisting him with story story now and screenplay is being written by two new people. Changes never cease here and hope all this is for the good.
Dia, what do you think of SONY opting out of TAM system?
-U
Dia,
DeleteAgree with you that using paper for decorations is not Eco friendly. As for wastage of food I remember there was a movement in 70s where ladies at weddings would go round with Thais to guests BEFORE they ate and request to take out what they thought they may not eat and food thus collected was sent to an orphanage .the food thus was not jootha ..forcing jootha food down throata of guests is definitely not a very people friendly Idealismis good but everything should be in MODERATION ..extremes of anything are not desirable and SELF RIGHTOUSNESS in anybody is anti social..means to an end are as important as the end ..
My two cents worth
Riya
Sorry Dia there is a double post, thought I lost the first one and rewrote it. Ignore one.
Delete-U
Uma, your post went into Spam .. Blogger does that occasionally :) Retrieved it!
DeleteRiya, agree with you ... there was also a time when one of the leaders, I think it was Sanjay Gandhi, cracked down on ostentatious weddings ... my uncle was deeply impressed and insisted for his wedding, he would take only 5 baratis. That did not even include his entire family, forget cousins etc ... Everyone was very upset, including the bride's parents, who said they had no problem feeding more guests ... But my uncle was adamant ... and he did exactly what he said he would. It upset a lot of people!
So when you stick to your convictions and go against the norm for them, it WILL offend a few people, no two ways about that.
I had no problem with the concept as a whole ... just these 2-3 things did not go down well with me. Serving simple food is fine, forcing your guests to finish what's in their plates is not. Not taking gifts is fine, asking guests to donate what they wanted to give is also fine ... but then it has to be left to them whether they want to do so or not.
And the venue should have been chosen more carefully ... when they knew there was a hospital nearby, the Sarabhais should not have chosen the art gallery.
Okay, I stand corrected ... I watched again, and Chhanchhan did tell Khimji bhai that his aashirwad was enough, and if he wanted, he could give the donation ... and he did. So that part was okay.
DeleteUma,
DeleteI have been in and out the whole day, hence the delay in replying to you ... wanted to sit when I had enough time!
I agree with you ... I think I made the same point on the forum as well, the intention was good, the message was good, but the execution went haywire. Most wedding guests anyway diss the bride's arrangements, so it would have been better if the arrangements had been shown to be good, and then being dissed by the aunties. That way the sympathy factor would have been on the girl's side and the thoughts behind the arrangements would have been appreciated. If the CV's were trying to give a message, they went about it the wrong way and may have lost some Brownie points.
Like I said above, on re-watch, CC with the elderly gentleman was not as bad as I felt at first watch. So my problem is with a few things ...
Sarabhais choosing a hall near a hospital in the first place, then asking the baraat to quieten - wrong choice of venue. Why an art gallery? Why not a local community or wedding hall? It didn't have to be a 5 star place, it could have been a simple place and had the same effect.
Paper decorations are not eco-friendly, real flowers, or even better, potted plants could have been used. And the decoration could have been done better even if it was by the orphans.
I will withhold comment on the pre-cap till it plays out in the episode today ... though I still feel asking guests to clear their plates at a wedding is not done. It's probably justified, considering the staggering amount of food usually wasted at weddings ... but it can be done in a much better way. Having a limited menu and simple food already proved the point it didn't have to be driven home.
Apart from that ...
I love the new ChanMan jodi ... they look good together, and I don't cringe at ChanMan scenes, even though we got very little of them today. Anuj is a far better actor than FK! I loved the little nok jhok between Manav and CC's mom, and the way he said he will be a son to them, not a damaad.
The three ladies were typical of guests at any wedding ... you always have namoonas like that, ready to point out all the flaws possible. The fact that their cribbing was mostly justified made them a little more irritating! Although, really ... who serves food at a wedding?! It's always self-service!
They have kept the fact that CC cares about the orphanage and the children there, present from the beginning of the show ... right from Puch Puch's party, to the first meeting with UB and even before that. So her wanting to donate money there was very much in character, and I also like that Chhanchhan is no shrinking violet, but is a confident girl who can put her views across to everyone.
I am hoping there will be more fun now. I am also expecting Khimji bhai to turn around in favour of the wedding and praise the Borisagars for their open views ... thereby shutting up UB for good. Somewhat like how the Mahila Mandal ladies praised UB for attending the computer classes, and thus stumped her plan of sabotaging the class. If the CV's have to make a point about eco-friendly weddings, it should be a positive point ... so far it looks as though eco-friendly weddings are to be avoided!
So let's see what happens today!
Dia,
DeleteAl south Indian weddings, and Gujarati weddings you are served food :-)