Monday 5th August
An interesting episode, bringing up an issue facing the peculiar way of thinking of Indian society, where a girl's responsibilities to family and in-laws take precedence over her duties and responsibilities to her husband. And how changing times mean that expectations are changing, and trouble arise when one partner has not kept pace.
The episode -
An interesting episode, bringing up an issue facing the peculiar way of thinking of Indian society, where a girl's responsibilities to family and in-laws take precedence over her duties and responsibilities to her husband. And how changing times mean that expectations are changing, and trouble arise when one partner has not kept pace.
The episode -
Manav
and Chhanchhan discuss how good Kaumudi bhabhi is … Kaumudi didn’t hear
anything – this time.
Manthan
and Sanjana – Manthan isn’t too happy in his marriage either … and Sanjana is
clueless. Kaumudi gets worried when Mukut doesn’t pick up the phone and goes to
ask Manthan if he can help. Manthan sends her to Manav.
And this
time Kaumudi does hear the damaging stuff … as Manav Chhanchhan discuss Mukut
bhai’s girlfriend and how it will affect Kaumudi. And Chhanchhan makes a remark
as to how she can understand Kaumudi’s fears because she also has faced the
fear of losing the person she loves, and wonders how Kaumudi will react when
she learns the truth about Mukut bhai’s girlfriend.
Guys,
keep your door SHUT when you discuss such confidential stuff … is it so hard to
remember?!
Kaumudi
flees to her room, a worried Chhanchhan runs after her, and after a small altercation
with Ranjana, Kaumudi finally opens the door to Chhanchhan … loved the way
Kaumudi kept her dignity intact in front of Ranjana, and only broke down once
she and Chhanchhan were alone inside her room – with the door shut this time,
thankfully!
Two
parallel conversations – Manav-Mukut and Chhanchhan-Kaumudi … on one hand Kaumudi
dreads the very thought of Mukut walking out on her and their kids, while Chhanchhan
reassures Kaumudi about the sanctity of the marital bond and the strength of
family ties, and tries to give her the courage to fight for her marriage. And
tells her that whatever Mukut is doing is wrong, he can’t walk out on a
marriage and kids just like that.
And on
the other hand, Mukut lists out to a shocked Manav, all the reasons he is
friendly with Mayuri at Kaumudi’s expense. And he did make sense, which was why
Manav actually listened quietly … it wasn’t just an affair, it was the feeling
of neglect by his wife at the expense of her domestic chores and duties to the
children, and a sharing of common interests with Mayuri. He has no intention of
walking out on his responsibilities, but he has equally no intention of giving
up a friendship which gives him the companionship he lacks in his marriage.
Hmm …
tough one here … wonder what Manav will tell Chhanchhan about this, as he did
seem to understand Mukut’s pov, shocked though he was.
A very interesting
juxtaposition of views – Chhanchhan, the girl with the so-called ‘modern’
upbringing, believes completely in the sanctity of marriage and the marital
bond, and advises Kaumudi that she must fight for her marriage. While Mukut,
from the so-called ‘traditional’ upbringing, stuffed to the gills with ‘sanskaar’
from childhood, is scathing about the bond and unapologetic about his
relationship outside it, not only that, he is fully prepared to continue it while
remaining married, and doesn’t see anything wrong in what he is doing, he has
fully justified it to himself. Wonder what he would feel if Kaumudi felt the
same and indulged in a fling of her own on the same grounds.
Chhanchhan
promises Kaumudi that they will try to sort the problem out, without
the family’s knowledge, as Kaumudi dreads the thought of Baa coming to know
anything.
In the
meantime, Manthan is hauled up by furious Babuji about missing Rs 10 lakhs, and
he promptly traces it to Mukut bhai’s personal account. Umaben tries to shield
the missing Mukut while Manek returns with Manav’s tiffin – apparently Manav
has spent the whole day chasing Mukut.
Umaben
shelters Mukut again from Babuji’s wrath and sends him to change, and warns him
they have something important to discuss with him.
Mukut asks
Kaumudi what his parents want to talk about, and tries to evade Mayuri’s phone
call. Kaumudi tells him she knows everything about Mayuri and he needn’t lie to
her.
Precap –
Babuji and Umaben want to talk presumably about the missing money, Mukut lets
out the news about his girlfriend.And the issue is set to explode.
Was thinking about how I would like to see this track go and this is what I came up with.
ReplyDelete1. Kaumudi take off for Maayka for a while with the kids. Ponder her life up until then and decide she has had enough of being just the bahu. Start a food based business or start taking tuitions. Ignore Mukut till he realizes what a gem of a wife he had. :)
2. Mukut spend more time with Mayuri and realize that familiarity breeds contempt and that with spending a lot of time together, pretenses are dropped and everyday life takes over. I don't want to show Mayuri as a vamp. Just how the blandness of every day life together just brings out the worst in us.
3. ChanMan help Kaumudi in opening up communications with Mukut. Focus on not taking what they have for granted.
A girl can dream can't she? :)
Enkay, liked your take...I would be happy if the creatives take a mature route in dealing with this track. No blame game or "bharatiya nari" cliched ways, but show how both Kaumudi and Mukut both have made mistakes and need to work at making their relation work.
DeleteEven UB does not have to be held totally responsible, she made a choice for her son based on her knowledge and experience, Mukut could have put his foot down, once married he could have tried to help and communicate with Kaumudi.
Yes, I would really like the creatives to give Mayuri a story and not paint her black.
This track has lots of potential and with the extension the show got, hope the creatives are brave enough to do something different instead taking a stereotypical way out.
-U
I agree with both of you here. I really like your idea, Enkay, and I hope the cv's are brave enough not to take the cliched way out here.
DeleteI do want them to show that Umaben tricked Mukut into marriage ... maybe based on her doubts about modern girls, but since Mukut's affair is obviously not of very long duration, that might not happen. So okay, Umaben felt he would be happier in the long run with a homely girl, while both spouses have different expectations of what they want from the relationship. But definitely I want Kaumudi to develop her personality more, and not remain such a doormat and glorified servant. And I would love it if she started a small home-based tiffin service and let Mukut realise that the quality he takes the most for granted is really such a huge asset. I feel most strongly that he needs to develop respect for his wife first - that's the most important step. He really takes her for granted ... and in a way, she takes him for granted too. Not accompanying him to a concert, not even getting up when he comes home ... all that are signs of neglect too.
I don't want Mayuri to be a vamp either. At most, let her just have fallen for the usual 'my wife does not understand me' story that Mukut spun, and let her back off when she realises that she is putting three lives and a family at risk.
Let's see ... really hope the cv's take this the unconventional way.
ReplyDeleteDia,
Bringing up children is not an easy task. the children belong to Mukut as well as Kaumudi. What has Mukut exactly done for his children. He has put the responsibility of the house and children on kaumudi and when she is doing it well, he cannot even give her credit. He should not have had children then. He has suddenly grown a spine to have an extra marital affair. Late growth kya?
Time is limited in any person's life. You can only do so much. Kaumudi is also a human being. When Kaumudi got married, she knew exactly which family she was going into and so it is unfair to suddenly expect her to be a superwoman homemaker and then start standing on her own two feet outside also. It cannot be done without support.
When i left my job of ten years to take care of my kids, it was a conscious decision on the part of my husband and myself but i still continue to be a bad home maker because i am definitely not trained and also for me everything being perfect in my house is not such a high priority. I can let the bed sheet remain unmade, postpone washing for the next day if i come across an interesting book that i have to finish the very same day.
And if Kaumudi has to do something else, exactly on whom is she going to give responsibility of her children to - Mukut, Umaben, ranjana, sanjana. who will do it willingly. Finally the responsibility for children stops with the parents. So unless the great mukut understands that the children also belong to him and not only kaumudi's and unless he gave a hand in reading to the children, kaumudi's work would never get done.
I remember both my husband and me used to love reading books but to get our kids interested in reading, i had to endlessly read books to my kids. my first kid took to reading effortlessly and by five was too impatient with me reading slowly and would just take it from me and started reading himself. But my second one even at ten preferred video games and just would not pick up a book. So i actually started reading again to him at bedtime at the age of ten and only then the impatience crept in as to what will happen next and the reading habit kicked off.
Even nowadays my day starts at 5.30 bcos my kids go to school and when my husband comes in, i am fast asleep with the food for him left on the table. He sms's me if he is eating out and i put the food in and crash since anyway my alarm is going to ring at 5.30 the next day. I dare my husband to grumble at me. he he he he
It is not easy. So unless he had taken some responsibility for his kids instead of only thinking of his talking, his rest, his this and my that......grrrrr.......and why the ....do these wives have to come and serve water in a tray to their darling husbands.
Anyway they will go the cliched route but I want to see what cliched route they take.
I can never understand when the men in serials complain about 'her interests' are so different from mine because i belong to maybe very small minority of couples where my husband and my interests are absolutely opposite. He loves coffee, i love tea; he loves reading, i love watching films and now because of the kids, TV, he loves history programmes, i love watching serials but life has never been difficult.
Anyway wrote something after a long time. Not structured thoughts but still....
Usha,
DeleteGood to see you after a long time!
Agree with you, bringing up children and running a home is not an easy task. I often say house work is the most thankless job in the world, you never get praised when things go smoothly, but even one small thing goes out of gear and the heavens seem to fall!
And I also feel that blaming the woman is very easy, but unless the husband is supportive, especially in a joint family, there is very little a wife can do on her own. There is a difference between son and bahu, what a son can get away with, in a bahu is termed disrespect and lack of culture ... unless the husband supports his wife, the wife is helpless.
I was watching a scene in some silly show where the husband tells his wife to wear jeans to a party, and since his mom doesn't like it, he tells her to wear them under her sari. the MIL catches her and literally strips the sari off the girl to show her jeans, and then flays her for being non-sanskaari! And the husband stays silent. It was such a ridiculous scene, but so typical ... if the guy had the guts to speak up and say, I want my wife to wear this, as we are visiting my friends, and this is what everyone wears, the mother would have to stay quiet.
Same thing used to happen with me when I was newly married - I wasn't sure of the do's and don'ts, and my husband was totally supportive, so my in-laws could not say a word to me about anything. When they visited, if both of us had to go out together, he would tell his parents, not me. I used to read to my kids every night too for years ... till the younger one was almost nine ... they could both read but they loved that extended bedtime. But once they were in bed, they were not allowed to leave their room, and my husband and I had our time together. And my husband enforced that, because he wanted his time with me, even if we just sat together and read our books in the same room, or watched TV together. He watched serials with me, I watch his movies with him ... its only now that our choices differ sometimes, so we watch separately sometimes, and together sometimes.
Manav is doing exactly that in his house, supporting Chhanchhan all the way. And Chhanchhan doesn't break rules, she tries to adjust ... as every DIL does. That is what Mukut has to learn to do ... if Kaumud is busy with kids and housework, he can take over the kids for some time, so she can finish her work faster. He can do simple things like help clear up by putting his plate in the kitchen - this might be where that comes in. And if he wants more companionship from Kaumudi, he has to see how he can help her - it's his mom who lays down the rules in the house, not her ...
Even with me and my husband, we have a lot of different interests, but we also have lots of common ones ... plus we have developed interest in each others' interests with time. Guess that happens with time ... but one has to be open minded to let it happen.
DeleteDia,
I also saw that sicko jeans episode. And the husbands are quiet in these places because of line of money control. They are nincompoops who don't have the confidence to earn a living and hence become so dependent on the money from the family business and hence don't open their mouths.