Friday, July 1, 2011

30/6 - Epi 19 ... Khushi - the loss of something precious

Yes, Khushi lost today ... or started to lose ... something very precious. The carefree innocent confidence of childhood, the childlike belief in the goodness of the world, her faith in humanity ... Khushi took her first step into an adult world today, and a painful step it was. Even though Khushi has been through tragedy in her life, the biggest tragedy a child can face, the loss of her parents, the status of an orphan with no one to call her own, but she's been cushioned from that pain by her new family, by an Ammaji who's strict but loving, by a babuji who dotes on her, who tells her that 'dil ke rishte khoon ke rishton se bade hote hain', reassuring her in so many words that no, she's not alone, by her jiji, who's always there for her, her unflinching (even if somewhat weak) support, even a Buaji, who even through her taunts, is still there as a family member. So Khushi has learnt to live with her pain, not just live with it, but smile with it, laugh through it, bury her insecurities deep and face the world with a smile ... because although she's lost a lot, she's gained something too, and she'd rather focus on the positives, than moan about the negatives.

But today Khushi couldn't do that. Flung suddenly into a world where people are not kind, where people laugh at her, make fun of her just because she's different ... that line she spoke to Shyam on the phone stung me deeply ... Added to which, she thought that all she had to do was to prove to Arnav that she could work, and he would change his opinion of her ... she never realised that he had taken this as a personal vendetta. All she was bothered about was clearing her name, which had been smirched time and again, wrongly, unfairly ... But when had this become a personal battle? And an unfair one ... ASR holds all the winning cards, he has the power, the strength, the backing of his termites (that's the office staff) ... all she has is her brain and her faith ... Which she needs, more than ever.
So yes, Khushi won the first battle ... but she lost something much more precious. She lost her innocence. And began the slow painful journey into adulthood, and into the real world. And she lost two things which defined her. Her nonstop chatter ... Khushi had not a single dialogue in the second half of the episode. Her eyes, her body language did all the talking.
And Khushi lost her smile.

On the other hand, Arnav - and the opposing polarity of their natures. Arnav has lost too, probably the same as Khushi ... his parents, he's an orphan too. But he's luckier than Khushi, he still has a family he can call his own, related by ties of blood, those who love him ... Yet his attitude is so different. He hates the world, hates it for what it took away from him, and never turns to look at what he still has. He's lost his faith in anything good, anything positive. The classic case of the optimist and the pessimist looking at the glass - one sees it as half-empty, the other as half full.

But why does he hate Khushi so much? What is this vendetta he has against her? And a very personal one - no one else (read Lame) can say a word to her. That right is reserved for himself, and himself alone. Maybe dimly he already sees in her, someone his equal, someone he has to battle with, to defeat, or else she will defeat him. A threat. Not to his power. But to his own self, to the Arnav he has built up carefully over the years, the one who defeats and destroys everyone else, who doesn't allow defeat to come anywhere near him. He's made victory a habit ... and this slip of a girl is not going to break that habit. Although he already knows somewhere deep inside him - she may be the only one who can.

Links
part 1
part 2


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